Wednesday's news

Yesterday was the day of the tattooing. And as usual, my fears were bigger than the event. (When will I learn?) I was expecting giant, disfiguring, glaring spots, about as big as a pencil eraser. What I got was a teeny, tiny, miniscule, barely-there dot, not quite this big: . Exactly what the technicians promised me, but hey, I’ve been promised things before and, well, I’m a little cynical. I have five of those teeny little dots, one on each side and 3 in the middle. They are there as guidelines for the radiologist so he (or she) can aim the zapper in exactly the right spot. We don’t want to “almost” hit the tumor, we want to smack it right in its ugly face.

That procedure started today, which I wasn’t expecting. I thought we were going to start it all on Monday—you know, new week, new procedures—but there I was, thinking again. I have to stop that. The radiation part wasn't bad at all. I just laid on the table while the zapper made buzzing and humming noises, and it was over in 5 minutes. I’ll get radiation every weekday afternoon for 6 weeks. The chemo will be done on Mondays (at least that’s what I think will happen; I’m probably wrong on that, too).

So this new adventure has begun. I wasn’t quite ready for it, but it’s here anyway; sort of like how my 40th birthday snuck up on me years ago, and that turned out to be OK. I am so grateful to have a workplace that is so very supportive of my time out, which has been and will be considerable. I am also grateful for my support groups, friends, and family, who listen to me whine in person and in print. And there are a couple of you who talk me off the ledge on a regular basis, and once I’m down, give me a smack to the back of the head. Yeah, I’m grateful to you, too.  ¶ 2:35 PM